First time renters unite

Learn from my mistakes…

You know you’re a first time apartment renter when you make these rookie mistakes:

1.  You rent an apartment above a restaurant and don’t think you’ll have a roach and/or rodent problem even though the super says he never sees anything running around.  If you live near food, there WILL be nastiness.  It’s a fact, Jack.

2.  You don’t have an agreement with your roommate that establishes a decrease in your rent when his/her boy/girlfriend all but moves in.  Never a pretty conversation to have, but then again it’s easier than having the convo about a pre-nup!  Consider this chat a rehearsal for later in life.

3.  You don’t make sure there’s laundry IN the building.  Walking 5 blocks schlepping 15 pounds of laundry and detergent in 105-degree heat is so not sexy.  Period.

4.   You move in with a roommate who turns out to be an alcoholic and you don’t move out because you don’t want to lose your security deposit.  FYI money can always be replaced; sanity and your life cannot.  **Drunks sweat horrible odors in their sleep.  If you must stay, invest in a family pack of Stick Ups.

5. You go to Ikea and furnish your ENTIRE place from there.  That’s the equivalent of wearing Garanimals, for god’s sake!   Have some self-respect and style and spice things up.  You don’t need to spend a zillion dollars on your pad — go to Marshalls, Ross, TJ Maxx, Salvation Army, Goodwill, a yard sale and add flavor.  Watch how flavor is added on the cheap with old record players in this guy’s room on my show I Live with My Mom.

6. You find a cool, free sofa on the street corner, you bringing home, set it up and begin kickin’ on it… and don’t think some critters have already taken up residents in said sofa.  Hello new freeloading roommates.  Street-finds are awesome additions as long as they’re not upholstered.

7.  You don’t take pictures of the apartment before moving in as proof of the condition to which it must be returned.

8.  You invest in a really comfy pullout sofa and don’t think you will forever have couch surfers.  Get a pull-out, but make sure the springs push up into the mattress just enough that somebody will only want to sleep on it for a few nights, not a few months.

9. You actually hammer nails into the wall!  There’s a 99.9% chance the lease says you’re not allowed to hang anything on the wall.  Easy fix.  Invest a couple of bucks in Command damage-free (removable) hooks as your mode of picture, coat-hook hanging.  Check out how sweet they are in this crazy pink room I did on SpacesTV.

10. You don’t immediately invite your parents over for dinner… that YOU actually cook!  Doesn’t have to be fancy.  Just needs to have some effort attached to it.  They raised your ass from the time you were an infant, the least you can do is show them what a good job they did raising you.  You get bonus points if you follow your Mom’s recipe for sauce.

Tweet me @TracyMetro #ILiveWithMyMom and tell me your biggest first-apartment rookie mistake.

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